Often, mindfulness alone is not enough to avoid getting trapped in depressed and anxious mind-states. Try as we may, sometimes our minds just keep getting stuck in negativity. In this case, we need to actively try to soothe ourselves. By being kind to ourselves when we experience black goo mind, remembering our inherent interconnectedness, we start to feel cared for, accepted, and secure. We balance the dark energy of negative emotions with the bright energy of love and social connection. These feelings of warmth and safety then deactivate the body’s threat system and activate the attachment system, calming down the amygdala and ramping up the production of oxytocin. Fortunately, research shows that oxytocin helps dampen our natural negativity bias. Compassion stops rumination in its tracks, engendering a hopeful outlook that asks “How can I calm and comfort myself right now?”
there is nothing as vulnerable as the wish for being seen….
inquiry for today~ how does it feel to be you today?
If we change our orientation to hope- moving from what we might get, to how we might get there- then hope is a concept I can get behind. We might not hope for a specific physical outcome, but instead hope to live this experience of loss in a way that is beautiful and personally meaningful. The most authentic hope I can offer you, or ask of you, is that you find ways to be true to yourself inside of this, inside all those changing things. I hope that you keep looking for beauty, hope that you find and nurture a desire to even want to look for it. I hope that you reach for your connection to love, that you seek it out as your anchor and your constant, even when all else has gone dark.