the tribe of validation


And when you showed me the Brooklyn Bridge
   in the morning, 
      Ah God,
And the people slipping on ice in the street,
                    two different people
                    came over, goin to work,
                    so earnest and tryful,
                    clutching their pitiful
                    morning Daily News
                    slip on the ice & fall
                    both inside 5 minutes
                    and I cried I cried
That’s when you taught me tears, Ah
   God in the morning,
      Ah Thee
And me leaning on the lampost wiping
                  nobody’s know I’d cried
                  or woulda cared anyway
                  but O I saw my father
                  and my grandfather’s mother
                  and the long lines of chairs
                  and tear-sitters and dead,
                  Ah me, I knew God You
                  had better plans than that
So whatever plan you have for me
Splitter of majesty
Make it short
Make it snappy
   bring me home to the Eternal Mother
At your service anyway,
   (and until)

….Jack Kerouac

these are the times that call for more than a little poetry, an ode to the old soul, and a little kitschy banter with old habits, regrets and self-judgment….may the game of life be real, light and full of heart…..

Most of us spend the better part of our lives creating and validating our worthiness or our value in the world by what is outside of us.

Internal validation is the descriptive essence of our soul. Income, status, degrees, and licenses can be stripped from us. But openness, passion, determination, truthfulness and other defining characteristics cannot be taken away.

Why then do we rarely describe the essence of who we are, rather than what we do or have?

Often, we feel that we are unworthy as we are. We may think we are worthy, but logic and feelings are widely different things.

Acceptance does not mean that you must love every aspect of yourself. It does not mean that you condone your flaws. It simply means that you are aware of them and have consciously chosen to withhold your self-judgments and self-criticisms.

Self-acceptance takes work and discipline. Maybe you learn self-acceptance through therapy or by allowing yourself Child’s Pose in Yoga when you need it. Maybe you learn it through heartbreak or failure.

However you do it, learning self-acceptance and validation is the one kind of work that can never be taken from you.

If you make the decision to accept who you really are and share that with the world, you will have an adjustment period in which you will have to learn to get comfortable with the uncomfortable.

The uncomfortable is breaking the bad habit that most of us have of not claiming who we really are. It is uncomfortable for many of us to be kind to ourselves.

As with breaking any bad habit, it takes vigilance. If you slip or forget, that’s okay, but it’s important to permit yourself a do-over.

So if someone asks me who I am, I’m going to say, “I’m an imperfect woman who has learned to accept her flaws and recognize that beauty dances with them.”……Lara Maurino

all those dead plans

Open to Me, so that I may Open.
Provide me Your Inspiration
So that I might See mine.

2 thoughts on “the tribe of validation

  1. My immediate thought was to a movie trailer I saw on Saturday for The Guardians of the Galaxy, and a point where Rocket (the raccoon) says, ‘Ain’t no thing like me, except me!’. Our imperfections and scars are the exact combination needed to create the miracle that is us. I’ve often wondered if some of the struggle so many kids have today is tied to an unfounded belief they evolved from pond scum. ❤

    • acceptance is as profound as forgiveness…..deep teachings I offer in many different ways when I teach yoga…..we are able to “see” when we step out of our smallness……deep care is offered and felt……pond scum grows lillies…….love to you dear Bobbie……

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